Really inappropriate jokes, but what else did you expect?

• I called my drug dealer, but he was on another line
• Called the swine flu help line, but all I got was crackling
• Called my SEO advisor, but he was on a call, telephone, mobile phone, cordless phone, telstra, optus, vodafone
• Called the Plastic Surgeon, but was cut off

Sorry, so bad only 4, but Im sure you have more…