I went to HR to raise the following key issues with respect to my work environment and fellow workers. In Australia these are key HR issues we should all be concerned about:
- Not having a support for my wrist, when using the computer mouse. I requested a $160 gel desktop wrist support to avoid injury immediately.
- A lighter laptop, as carrying my 1,7kg laptop is just too heavy, so needed a 1,5kg laptop. Happy to carry a heavy bag on my back but only at training which is my time. Also my laptop was already 6 months old. Unacceptable.
- No ergonomic set up of my screen, chair, desk and keyword at work, a disgrace!
- Having to pay for my own cab home after attending free work dinner and drinks on a night I would have gone out on anyway. Outrageous.
- Denying my expense claim for coffees because I was in Melbourne and not Sydney. I drink coffee in Sydney, but FFS had to go to Melbourne for work!
- Not getting a raise and promotion every 6 months. I am awesome!
The struggle is real so I took these to Kaksak HR. This was the response:
I deserve better. Working for South African companies suck!
After reading John Raath’s post called “You need a plan to live in South Africa” we at the Kaksak thought about what sort of plan you may need to live in Australia, if you were a South African.
We think John has missed out all the countries that are in fact not worse than South Africa and in fact had only considered the countries worse than South Africa as movable options.
Secondly he mentions the things that are special like mountains and wine and people and as such insinuates that there are no other beautiful countries in the world.
John, we at the Kaksak think you need to get out more.
Having said that, we do love the motherland, Biltong and ofcourse the Springboks and watch in sadness at some of the issues consuming South Africa at this time.
So back to Aussie. If you are a South African immigrant, here are the things you need to plan for in Australia:
- There are better places to live than Australia, but not many. So make your plan to get a job, permanent residency and then ultimately to become a citizen.
- Start enjoying water in the morning, coffee costs $5, yes that is R50 a cup.
- Find a Government department you haven’t been getting freebies from, and jump on the bandwagon.
- The resources boom is over, only property continues to go up. If you don’t own property, buy some. Be the best investment you ever make.
- Keep your savings in Australia, they tax the shit out of you otherwise. Actually they tax the shit out of you anyway.
- Make a plan to deal with the fact that your children will support the Wallabies and speak with Australian accents when they grow up and refuse to be seen with you when you wear your springbok rugby jersey
- Whinge, because it is un Australian not too.
- Make sure you buy beer and lots of it. There is no greater crime than running out of beer especially in summer. Warm beer is just as ugly.
- Biltong will cost $60 per kilo. Deal with it!
- Have a big heart, share your beer, not your biltong.
- If none of this resonates, consider moving to Tasmania.
You can read the original article “You need a plan to live in South Africa” here.
And aside from that, enjoy the wonderful people, countryside, snow, mountains, Great Barrier reef and all the other wonderful things Australia has to offer you and your family.
As you know, along with everyone else we don’t really look at any porn here at the Kaksak. The porn industry is a billion dollar industry watched by nobody. Nobody who will admit to it. If you are one of them this post is for you. See what happens as you watch more and more porn. Graphs are powered by Kaksak Research:
So, we have seen NSW beat Queensland in Origin, we have seen Spain been beaten twice and we have Julian Assange asking the US to drop the investigation into Wiki leaks.
What we havent seen until today is a happy person doing search marketing. Yes friends, something we thought we would never see and it has happened. How on earth, we have no idea. Neverthess there is a happiest man in search. Good luck brother. May the force be with you. Maybe its the water in Melbourne who knows, but happy days indeed.
Now get me another beer! Lets watch some football. How do I find the scores again. Hangon, let me search!!! And that my friends is why we have a happiest man in Search.
Pretty much every day shit for me, Duke Dumont just managed to out some music to it. Well done:
Similar thing happened to me in Penrith once at the leagues club. Managed to squeeze out of the ladies toilet window and escape in my ute just before it got ugly. Chick looked similar as well. Streuth!!
Merry Christmas with Limited Liability, yes folks thanks to all you lawyers this is where it has gotten to, the Kaksak hopes you are proud of yourselves. So here goes, it is the 1st of December so Merry Christmas* from all of us here at the Kaksak!
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