Tag Archives: Political

Misogynist – The full Definition

So Julia Gillard has said Tony Abbott is a misogynist. We at the Kaksak said WTF is a misogynist?

We also said, why is our esteemed prime minister worrying about what Tony Abbott is or isn’t when there are boat loads of people smugglers arriving every second day and this was a model due to be smashed when she became PM. What is she doing about the economy? The increasing job losses, reducing company profits, dropping iron ore prices, increasing Government debt? The to top it all off, a labour function making sexist jokes. We at the Kaksak, being the voice of the people of Bankstown say Seriously???

All we hear is rhetoric: “we are not only talking about it, but getting on with the job” they say.

We say bullshit. If you are as you say getting on with the job, you are doing it both badly and slowly.  Also the talking about is we think is actually driving more greenhouse gas, given the amount of talk and the amount of action.

So please can you politicians pull your heads out of your asses, don’t worry about misogynists, only the yanks really seem to give a shit anyway and they are full of it anyway. Go Mitt!! Actually Gazza looked up the meaning of misogynist. No, actually he tried to work it out himself, it is apparently a Japanese soup made in the mist?

So please Australian Government, the hard working people of Bankstown are asking you to do your jobs instead of sitting around arguing about crap. Get some things done that will make this country great, drop the red tape, get people working and stop bogging down business with tax and over protective regulation to the point where people are not even responsible for themselves!!!

Rudd v Gillard and who will win

Wow, when Pik Botha and PW Botha were in charge there was none of this kak. Now unless you are a back stabbing whinger with high self interest you cannot hack it in politics.

Anyway, the Kaksak in the interest of public policy thought we should consult the Sangoma on who might be victorious on Monday. Basically, either way Julia is rooted and we don’t mean by the First Bloke either… So this is exactly what the Sangoma saw in his (Made in China) bones.

If Julia wins, her approval rating will drop below 15% which is the death knell and most likely Steven Smith will take over within 3 months anyway. If Julia loses she will be on the backbench and most likely out of a job in 3 months. Read on.

If Kev wins he will be PM and put Julia on the back bench. If Kev loses he will become an independent and take the Government to an election anyway. He is popular in his seat in Queensland, so he would retain it and his job and live out the the rest of his days in a chilled state. He has enough frequent flyer miles now to continue travelling, but is actually pretty gatvol after travelleing so much at the Kaksaks hard earned tax dollars.

Only drama might be if Kev wins and the independents do something silly, but why would they, they still have 18 months of the gravy train left.

Basically Julia can only come out of this badly. As for Wayne Swan it will probably be worse, but then as a short bloke he should be used to this kind of shit.

So the Kaksak is watching with interest to see who will prevail.  Being completely independent we have decided to share would we believe would be suitable punishments for both Kev and Ms Gillard if the other wins:

Anyway, here goes:

What Kev will do:

  1. Only allow side profile head shots of back bench parliamentarians going forward
  2. Institute a parliamentary swimsuit calendar compulsory for backbenchers for 2012. Julia will be Miss March and be featured with a large knife strategically placed
  3. Enforce the saying or prayers in parliament, to be lead each day by Julia
  4. Make her share an office with Bob Katter and Andrew Wilkie
  5. Double the allowances for MP’s with children

What Julia will do:

  1. Make Kevin pay for his own dam flights
  2. Only allow him to speak in parliament on one condition, if he promises not to use the words “and let me say this”
  3. Ambassador in Baghdad, effective immediately
  4. Make him share an office with Oakshott and Windsor
  5. Actually none of the above, if he goes, so will she….
What the Kaksak says. Kev, you have the balls to stand up and try and take back what was yours, good on you, you deserve to be PM for giving it a go. We support you. Right after Tony Abbott.

 

 

The Carbon Tax cometh

I have not been blogging in protest of the carbon tax. This is the most ridiculous thing. Joolya, do you really wanke up everyday looking forward to getting to work, forward to setting back Australia economically and forward to losing your job at the next election if not earlier? Please pull yourself toward yourself and stop this insanity.

If you agree with the carbon tax, leave us a comment, or read our protest carbon tax post

Carbon Tax Explained – What you need to know?

Given all the fuss abut the carbon tax, the Kaksak crew (Gazza and I) sat down and decided to explain it in pure English. First we turned to Google and found that to be of little help….

Google search for Carbon Tax

 

OK, so their must be a politician other than Julia Gillard that can explain this this to us. BTW do they allow booze into parliament?

 

 

OK, so moving right along, we got slightly side tracked by the hockey pokey, you put your petrol in, you put your petrol out and you shake it all about. WTF? And these people get paid by our taxes. I told Gazza this was his fault, if he paid more tax he would get better politicians, thus we are getting a carbon tax to be able to afford better politicians. Right…

So we then asked the people of Bankstown what they thought of the carbon tax.

Protest about carbon tax

Straight to the point. Thats how we like it in Bankstown. I think all the hot air did even more damage to the environment.

 

 

Harbour Bridge protest – Sydney

Reading about Mick, the father who protested on the harbour bridge, and the fact that his he ex military, looks mean and is built like a brick shithouse, as we have decided to say is “Good on ya Mick”

You just put us (Me & Gazza) in an awkward situation with the harbour bridge protest thing. Friday we headed in early to leave early, just before we walked into work we saw the traffic was rooted, so we headed to Bondi to check for sunbathing chicks and get a bite. I texted my boss at 10:00 to say the traffic was still rooted and we were trying to get there, seriously, only to find out you had cleared off at 7:22. Mate, next time they say the bridge is going to be closed for the foreseebale future, please take some saamies (Sandwiches) and stay there for the day. 2 hours ain’t a protest, its breakfast. We got kakked on big time by the time we got back to work.

Now I also read you plan to do this again. Excellent, but can you give us warning and please get a Twitter feed or similar so we can check when you have decided to stop and we can manage our day off a little better.

Also hope you get the kid issues sorted out. My brother in law is usually looking for ways to get away from the kids, but hey.

 

 

A new day in NSW

Congratulations Bazza on winning the NSW state election.

Gazza texted me this morning and said the busses were definitely faster this morning when he went to shift and Toula confirmed the traffic was flowing easier when she caught a cab at 2am back from the Rocks to Bankstown last night, but she also said she was a bit pissed. She also asked who Christina Keneally was, and what all the fuss was about? Western Sydney is now a Liberal stronghold, who would have thunk? League supporters voting for a bunch of right wing capitalists. Maybe because all the Westies are Tradies, and have started their own businesses riping of the suits who are now actually the labour voters, but thats another story.

It is like there is a new political spring is in the air. Obeid, Tripodi, Unions etc. all gone. The iPad 2 is here. We are entering a whole new era.

The old signage when you entered New South Wales will have to be taken down and new signs put up today. This one still up today. What going on Bazza?

High Risk of Robery and Prostitution

The Libs also know how to party hard and started immediately. This was the Marrickville celebration early in the evening. In line with Bazza’s frugal economic policy they agreed to 1 drink each. No one really cared that it was a tight match between Labour and the Greens anyway.

Liberal Party Victory Celebrations

We love Bazza but felt he hadn’t really highlighted too many policies, in fact all he had to do was stand there, not get caught at any gay clubs, not punch any babies in the face and he would have won. In fact, a card board cut out of Bazza would’ve done it. I knew this when Gazza, the laziest bastard on the planet said he was thinking about who to vote for.

So taking what little has been said, in a nutshell this is what has broadly been promised, according to our interpretation:

  • No payroll taxes
  • No property taxes or transfer duties
  • No carbon taxes in NSW
  • Cleaning up the Taxi industry so we pay a reasonable fare and get a quality service
  • No traffic jams, if you have one you can claim compensation
  • Hospital beds for all, even if you are not ill
  • Consolidation of the Councils into 1 and the removal of all the Council Klingons state wide
  • No deals for mates, only non mates
  • New freeways, everywhere
  • More dog racing in Dapto

Finally, as Bazza is taking over, one essential requirement to get this done is technology. The Kaksak got a snapshot of Bazza’s new computer keyboard. Not sure if he has used it yet!

Oh Shit Button on Keyboard

The Kaksak would also like to say we are sorry for the Labour folk who will be out of jobs Monday, we don’t wish that on anyone, but then over the last 16 years some of you have done a really kak job and unfortunately all of you have had to pay the price. But, if Bazza can turn it around as he says he can, you should be much better off in the long run when NSW is number 1 again. Chrstina, please don’t take the Ralph offer seriously, and good luck in whatever it is you do going forward.

Any intelligent thoughts on the state election. Note we said intelligent, not spam or slanderous.

Sydney Bicycle Pathways – Kaksak Perspective

Initially I thought a whole lot of bicycles had been murdered, then I thought maybe they were trying to reduce the population of Sydney by letting them think they were on a cycleway when actually they were on a highly trafficked road, just as dangerous as it was before, but now with while bikes painted on it. A false sense of security so to speak, see pic below. WTF?

Sydney-bicycle-pathways

Now Ive realised the local councils haven’t got a clue, are copying each other and trying to convince us there are bicycle paths through our suburbs. Guys, these roads were dangerous before, a bicycle painted on the road is not going to change anything and I’m sure I could make up a path to ride less dangerous, without your help. So we look forward to more money being wasted in the months to come when all these little white bikes have to be removed, after someone gets run over or runs into the back of a car and sues the local council.

I asked Gazza what he thought and he said he thought the bicycles were secret messages outside houses where people with bicycles live. He said he read something similar about free wifi spots, where they mark the houses. I asked Toula what she thought and she said she thought it  showed where a bicycle had been stolen and was shocked by how many had gone missing in recent months. She thinks Joolya has gone soft on crime.

I say put them on the pavements and let the cyclists fight it out with the pedestrians, more fun to watch and more fair. Hitting a cyclist with a ton of steel just ain’t fair.

What do you think? How arbitrary is this plan?